Only in the 80's man...

Brian: "Are you giving me a snow job?"
Theo: "OOOH SNOWJOB! That Sounds Sexy!"

Who is dancing for who?

"Hey Larry, tomorrow is Secretary's Day so don't forget it's the day for the lap dance."

I don't think he understands the concept of detoxing

Theo: "Heather detoxes too, but she detoxes from people."
Me: "In other words Heather stops talking to you for two weeks and you call it a detox?"
Theo: "Well..."

Sometimes the setting is the worst part

(In the second floor men's bathroom)

"From now on I am not going to hold it in for as long as I can. Instead I am just going to go when it comes. You know, like the indians."

Boogers

"My biology teacher in high school used to say that the carbon that comes out of your nose (ie boogers) could be the carbon from dinosaurs."

He is one of those guys.

"I don't pee in closets although I did put my bed in there once and sleep in there."